Killing Time 'Till I Die

2006-01-29T13:55:00.000+08:00

Ricky, your true color is Black!

Your color is black. The color of night. Serene and mysterious, black conjures up images of elegant evening gowns, dashing tuxedos, and gleaming limousines. Traditionally a symbol of success, black also represents power and an uncompromising demand for perfection. Not surprisingly, you tend to set challenging goals for yourself and do whatever it takes to achieve them — your strength of character is second to none. This unfaltering determination, along with your natural elegance, impresses people. But keep in mind that your personality might be intimidating to some. Try to temper your demanding side with a little softness — trust us, it won't kill you. Overall, though, black is the color of professionalism and achievement, which means it's clearly the color for you.

..............

2006-01-19T23:33:00.000+08:00

Zach left us today. He left and he will never return to our side again.

The friendship that you shared with me will never be forgotten.

The times when we shared jokes.. the times when we shared our thoughts with girls.. the times when we were angry with each other and neither one of us spoke with each other for a couple of weeks until we forgot what we were angry about.. the times when you sided with me when i needed help.. the times when we went to timezone to try out that new punching game.. the time when you invited me to attend your brother's birthday and you keep pestering me to look at your girl cousin..the time when you, marcus, and i went to places just to find a cheap shop to play starcraft.. the times when we walked the football field everyday two times a day.. and the time when I watched you fight the fight that defined who you are today as a brave, courageous, and great friend.. I know you will never back out in a fight..

All of this I will treasure in my memory forever. In my heart you will always be remembered not only as a friend but as a brother I wish I had. You died fighting. For me, you died with honor.. that which only a few of us will have a priviledge to have in death.

The brown handkerchief that you gave me.. it will serve as a remembrance of the great times that we had as close friends in high school. To me, it's worth will be priceless.

May your death find the justice that it deserves.

May you rest in peace.

tsk... = (

RJ

P.S. Damn the shooter.. May he suffer eternal torment as he rot in hell..

Sollicitus

2006-01-18T21:43:00.001+08:00

haaay.. nandito ako.. nakaupo.. masakit ang ulo(aling ulo? XD).. pinipilit magtype sa keyboard at nagmamadali dahil gusto ko na matulog.. ang badtrip naman o.. hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko. nahahati ang katawan ko sa isang suliraning mahirap malutas. sa kasalukuyan ay nangangalaiti ako sa galit at lungkot. haay nako buhay nga naman talaga. araw araw tinutulak ka hanggang sa mahulog ka at pagka hindi ka tumulak pabalik ay ihuhulog ka talaga nito. at ako? lagi akong nakabagsak sa lupa...

kailangan ko nanaman magdesisyon.. isang mahriap na desisyon.. siguro ganun nalang.. para hindi na lumaki pa..

akala nyo masaya ako? hehe..

rj

Sollicitus

2006-01-18T21:43:00.000+08:00

Septem... tristis

2006-01-17T21:53:00.000+08:00

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...

2006-01-17T09:22:00.000+08:00

Eye of the Tiger

Risin' up, back on the street
Did my time, took my chances
Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet
Just a man and his will to survive

So many times, it happens too fast
You change your passion for glory
Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past
You must fight just to keep them alive

Chorus:
It's the eye of the tiger, it's the cream of the fight
Risin' up to the challenge of our rival
And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night
And he's watchin' us all in the eye of the tiger

Face to face, out in the heat
Hangin' tough, stayin' hungry
They stack the odds 'til we take to the street
For we kill with the skill to survive

chorus

Risin' up, straight to the top
Have the guts, got the glory
Went the distance, now I'm not gonna stop
Just a man and his will to survive

chorus

The eye of the tiger (repeats out)...

2006-01-10T00:10:00.000+08:00

JOHN LENNON lyrics - "Imagine"

Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today...

Imagine there's no countries
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace...

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will be as one

Odium

2006-01-09T22:49:00.000+08:00

I hate you. You're a bitch. You're a gay whore. You know, I can't wait for you to die. I don't even want to talk to you. Why do I even bother..

You're a bitch dad. An absolute fucking bitch..

I try hard to live up to your expectations and you do what.. you always see that as a failure. You always have no time. You are hard to talk to. Now you don't know me or what I have become. You do not know the life I live now. You are always stuck in the past.. always thinking of me as a weak boy who can achieve nothing. You always think that what you say is perfect and the absolute truth. You don't even give me a chance to explain.

I envy my friends. At least they have a dad who spends time with them. At least they have a dad who they can talk to. At least they have a dad who knows who their son is.

I liked the time when you were in jail. At least I didn't have to listen to one of your fucking speeches.

I am really, really angry at you right now. Damn you to hell..

Cogito Ergo Sum

2005-12-22T20:59:00.000+08:00

What is the meaning of life? Why do we live? What is our purpose in this world? Do we even have a purpose? There are so many questions yet the answer lay hidden still. For so long have we been in search and for so long we still are. Now I will try to answer that which I have evaded and so I pray that I can finish it till the end.

I only have been given one life and its end I cannot be sure. But I am sure it is only one and I dare not find out more. So I ask myself "What is the meaning of this life? my life?" This question and the answer it holds seem simple yet it perplexes me still and I think is beyond my comprehension.

I live my life as I see fit and its control I firmly hold. I have my goal and as I grow do embrace it still. Yet what it means to live this life is still a blur to my eye. Like being in a sandstorm in a dessert I cannot even cling to anything that I may start from somewhere. It is like looking for light in an endless cavity ruled by darkness.

I am that I am and it burns still in my eye. For you it may mean nothing yet for me it means everything. No one can be me except only me. I live to be alive and I am alive so that I may live my life as me. And so, the meaning of life is one.

---

Why have I been asked to do which I have no damn clue? To write this, yes, I must be true to myself and to you. But the truth of me which you seek differs from what I speak. For you will insist in an endless pek and I will insist in the towers peak.

I am that which is nothing yet you expect everything. I am that which is now gone long before this has been done. And you still insist in an endless peek and I will insist in the towers peak.

I am that which is now dead and now that which cannot tread. I see the world in a dying bed and yet unable to stop the poison lead. And still you insist in an endless peek and I will insist in the towers peak.

And I wonder how thois will end.
For you still insist in an endless peek.
And I will insist in the towers peak.

Destituo II

2005-12-10T00:05:00.000+08:00

Family

Tita Lourdes just arrived last Wednesday from Australia. She came here because her mother who's living in the province died and she's staying with us for a day before she goes there. And boy... what an accent! I was sleeping when she came but she knocked on the door nevertheless and shouted: "Hey Ah Jay! Ah Want Tew See Yew!" Damn, that really woke me up. Anyway, she's really nice even though this is the first time that I met her. She showed me pictures of my cousins Jason and Leanne. She gave me a delicious box of apple and cinammon bars that you couldn't find anywhere here. Actually, she just gave me one bar but she saw that I already finished it and I was reaching for another one so she just gave me the whole box lolz. She also gave me a box of chocolates stuffed with truffles. YUM!!! I can't wait to spend some time with them in Australia (maybe after I graduate?). They have a farm there and I want Jason to teach me how to catch prize salmons. Hehe...

School

I hate Physics! I hate it I hate it I hate I hate it! No matter how good the professor the thing is I just hate Physics! What good will it do to my life anyway? I don't care how fiction and the angle of inclination of the road affects the speed of the car that I'll drive. That's why I took up management. I'll leave those Newton's Laws to those physicists. For now I don't care if I ace this subject or not. I just want to pass it and get it over with.

Anyway, I have just been invited by Ms. Peewee(a.k.a Goddess. lolz!) to become a member of the Loop, iAcademy's official paper. Our first meeting will be on Wednesday because publication will be on January na. Hmm, I wonder what we will do...

Friends

P10 is as strong as ever (I hope).

Nyt!

RJ

Destituo

2005-11-28T22:48:00.000+08:00

Friday

I didn't go to class. It's because we... damn it. Have to print something. Will continue this tomorrow. Nyt.

Heri

2005-11-13T21:35:00.001+08:00

I thought I'd upload some damn pictures... you know.. for memories sake.
Why is there a fucking huge space here? I can't fix it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

	Tis Ate Leanne when she was a kid.
	Tis Ate Leanne a kid no more... and Uncle Barry
	Ahh the good ol freshman days. Left is young scrooge and right is old scrooge. I wish we videotaped that play. Tis awesome!
	Some of my friendly friends. There's me the cute one! =p
	The p10 brotherhood. Whoa!!!!!

That's all for today. Why? I'm sleepy and lazy that's why. Nyt!

RJ

Novare

2005-10-25T10:58:00.000+08:00

Blog renovation complete!!!!!!!

YEEEEAAAAHHHHHH!!!

RJ

Coelus

2005-10-08T23:45:00.001+08:00

 Look at this bright endless sky. It is very nice to look at. It is nothing yet it is something. It is just like our goal in life. It is infinitely vast and endless. It is bright ,shining, and we dream to reach it someday. Underneath it is a sea of hope. You can see it but you can't touch it. You can feel it but you can't reach it. But when you do reach it, you are filled with the light of joy.

Man, I didn't know until now that there would be tons of papers to process and taxes to be paid when you want to start a business. First there is this DTI permit then this BIR registration. Then there would be this municipal license then sanitation and fire inspection permit. And then there is this TIN requirement. Damn it! It's okay if I know that this would be going back to me. But it's not! For all I know it would just end up in some crappy old man's wallet. Damn this old government. I can't wait for them to die and be replaced by us. hehe. It's now only a matter of time...

Anyway, I saw on the list last friday that I passed part 1 of the IBM certification and I'm the 7th highest. Woohoo! I can't believe it that even though I'm a management student I still passed that IT exam. But it's also sad to think that out of the 71 of us who took the exam only 37 passed. Oh well, there's always next year and it's only part 1. Part 2 is still yet to come. Let's pass this guys!

Right now, I'm pressured to hell. First, I've got to get this business to get started before december starts. Then there is this emproj thesis thingy that requires us to follow a strict submission schedule. Then there will already be two major exams next week. Then there is this me being the head of two org activities that is supposed to be launched this term. Ohhhhh man, what pressure... And I love it!

I'm so happy right now that I'll give you some sugar. Here!

Orior

2005-10-05T23:40:00.000+08:00

Hmm? Hmm.. Hmm!!!

I'm currently wondering why I'm in front of my PC typing this crap. Maybe I'm bored. Maybe I'm angry. Maybe I'm happy. There are so many possibilities for the cause of this action yet the only effect produced is the asking of the self for the cause. It seems intertwined in an infinite string of events moving in a pace that lets me look but not see. I can only but wonder why I cannot comprehend the meaning of this thought. Yet I enjoy this feeling of nothingness. The purpose set aside, I delve into the pleasure of silence. I am running in circles with no end in sight. I am still running. Yes.. I'm alive.. and still running.

Ten Most Important Things I Have to Remember for No Particular Reason in No Particular Order

1.) You are sick. No smoke, no drink, no hunger for 3-6 months. Take medication and injection daily or die.

2.) You have to own at least 1 business before I graduate... or die.

3.) You are now a VPX. BeCon is now prohibited.

4.) God is only an imaginary being created by man in his image because of his refusal to accept the fact that the future of the world is his sole responsibility.

5.) Emproj is a priority. Do it. Enjoy it.

6.) The Philippine government is crap. Change it... or die trying.

7.) Be more umm... friendly?

8.) You hate your dad and you hate him so much that you want to puke. Hate him more. Hate him forever.

9.) Don't let schooling interfere with your education.

10.) Remember this list yesterday and forget it tomorrow. What about today? ...Who cares?

RJ

Solus

2005-07-01T23:33:00.000+08:00

Ion Peepz:

You are living in an illusion
-------------
You crave for lust and affection
-------------
You smell of lovely carnation
-------------
You are a faithful companion
-------------
You seek escape from damnation
-------------
You put yourself in isolation
-------------
You are a brass clarion
-------------
You are a slow infection
-------------
You do not know you're destination
-------------
You are a world of confusion
-------------
You exhibit a cold expression

Icio

2005-06-18T01:26:00.000+08:00

Too much fighting...
Too much hate...
Too much backstabbing...
Too much secrets...
Too much anger...
Too much pride...
Too much carelessness...
Too much misunderstanding...
Too much confusion...
Too mush masking...
Too much pain...

And I thought we were all friends...

I hate you guys...

Obliviscor

2005-06-17T10:45:00.000+08:00

Let me escape from reality.

The reality of this proud and selfish society.

The society that tries to be perfect yet only breaking itself to pieces.

The pieces and fragments of our dream of perfection.

The perfection of the system that we want to be our achievement.

The achievement that we can break free from the bonds of hate and pain.

That from pain and chaos we want to break free.

The free people that we want to be.

And now we are slowly gaining our freedom.

And so much is our hunger.

And we want more.

And didn't realize that too much freedom is chaos.

And now chaos rules once again.

And what should I do?

Let me escape from reality.

Desero

2005-06-14T22:36:00.001+08:00

Leave me alone!

Furca

2005-06-10T00:09:00.000+08:00

I thought I'd update today...
===
I'm quitting YEA and BUDYS today. Why? Its because I dont see a reason to be involved in these things anymore... and probably I'm just a burden to them now. I have great confidence that they would do very well even without me... besides, DOTA's calling to me now.
===
We have a new set of professors this term. I'm glad that Alma has been replaced by a somewhat better prof. Damn it, she sucks like hell that it isn't even funny anymore.
===
My sched. is crap. Yes, it's crap. I don't even have to explain. Use your imagination.
===
Yesterday we have beaten the DOTA brothers and their clan for the first time. It was such an accomplishment for us. We thought we're dead since all of our towers are now gone and our SK can't even kill a hero but they were too overconfident in their skills. After they killed roshan, his death empowered us to make one final push. Myks(CM) and I(Razor), full of rage and hatred because of Roshan's death, spearheaded into their left flank, killed Ursa Warrior and Mortred, injured Vengeful and broke through their defenses like a knife piercing through butter. As our comrades saw this opening, they were immediately filled with hope. We were joined by SK just in time as we were entering the main base. We were then joined by Bene(Lycan) also just in time as Ursa and Vengeful tried again to push us back. The strength of four heroes were no match for the two as Ursa died again and Vengeful again retreated. Meanwhile, back at our base, Necro tried to take this opportunity to attack our undefended base. Fortunately, a savior appeared (Chestah w/ his Lancer) and killed Necro for us. Our base is safe once more as Chestah took command of the base defenses while we were pushing through the enemy's flank. No one could stop us now. Finally, we managed to destroy the throne of the fools ending the game with victory in our hands. May Roshan guide us forever. ^_^
===
My nice cousin Michelle(one of my very, very few relatives that I'm lucky to have) that I haven't seen and talked to for almost 5-6 years called last night. Well, what do you expect happened next?

We talked for awhile but because we haven't seen each other for a very long time we agreed to meet somewhere sometime this month. She said that once she gets back to her dorm tomorrow she'll call to tell me when her free time is. Oh well I guess I'll have to wait...
===
Many people say that GMA is an incompetent fool. I dont agree with them... yet I also dont disagree. In business, if the organization is falling apart then no matter who made it fall the leader will always have to take the heaviest punishment. Hey, wait I'm getting sleepy already.... Hey, Pach I'll continue this later ok?

Nyt...

Neuter

2005-06-03T00:14:00.000+08:00

Paupertinus Vestigium....

Arbitrium

2005-06-01T00:01:00.000+08:00

Its decision making time again!

What would I choose? An 18th birthday party of a friend or an outing to baguio?

PLACE.. YOUR.. BETS.. NOW!

2005-05-30T23:02:00.000+08:00

Azrael

Loginquitas

2005-05-28T22:36:00.000+08:00

... et scaturrio de ventus commeabile aput aperire fenestra.
... am frigus, am frigus, am gelatorius frigus.
... et spoliare de tempus commeabile aput crastina.
... id reptatus, in festinatio, id reptatus.

Damn, time flies by so fast. So fast that if you let go it leaves you cold and alone in the dark. The thing is, I let go a long time ago...

They say that sacrifices are to be made for the greater good. It's right, isn't it? But sometimes it's not. Yet this one will seem to be right this time.

"Id doleos"...

Omnis secundus, tempus fero me propi ad mors.

2005-05-25T23:49:00.000+08:00

I just found out that the opening of classes is moved to June 6 instead of June 1. Damn, that means that I would spend another week of my life doing absolutely nothing. Sure, I could keep myself busy with YEA matters, hobbies like game development, helping with the business and such stuff but nothing really beats seeing all of your friends again and cutting class to play DOTA.

Now you would ask why dont I just play DOTA now? The answer is that playing DOTA is much more fun and exciting when you know that you have missed a class because of it. Dont you agree with me? For example, when I find out this term that our accounting will be handled by a certain "Alma" again then I will be much more entertained to skip that class in favor of a better use for my time----hanging out with friends. Dont you see the logic in there?

Anyway, so what happened this previous days? Nothing really except that Im preoccupied with Bloodlines. I plan to submit it on a contest and win $200! Well, that is if I can finish it on time. The contest deadline is on July 31, 05 and Im only .08% finished. Wow, thats 99.02% more to go! As the saying goes, "Quality first before quantity!". Wait, that quote has no connection at all with this paragraph. Oh well...

Oh shit! I just remembered! I forgot to attend the Powerbooks Book Club Session. Tsk, that makes it two absences this year. Daaaaaaaaamn....

On our previous YM conversation, Pachi made me guess... hmmmm... who? Aw, come on Pach! At least give me a clue!

Whooooooooooosh!
"If this is living, I'd rather be dead"
*sigh*

Poenitudo

2005-05-22T23:39:00.000+08:00

Everyone's asleep.. no one's online... I begin to wonder if I will miss the times. And I wonder why this one rhymes...

I know I made the wrong decision in your point of view... but for me I am doing what I believe is right. For we , the people living in this world, have different beliefs. What I deem right will some people deem wrong. This is the way of life. That is why there are so many killings going on. Why the fuck do so many religions exist? That is why chaos still exist in this world. People ins---

Anyway, back to the topic. Yes, I am still pissed off. But now I am thinking maybe bacause its my fault. If I knew then that your problem would lead to this then I would have helped a long time ago. You turned a small problem into a big one. You have been stuck in a hole then but what you did is you just kept digging and look at you now. Youre still stuck but now in a deeper hole. I cant do anything now. I cant reach you now. Youre too deep. But what am I back then? I am just a shadow of a peice of rock back then.

I know that when the time comes you will forget about me. And I will forget about you. You will leave me as I will leave you. I know that we wont miss each other. I know we cant turn back now. You have decided and I regret that I aint there to make you change your decision.

*sigh* I want to turn back time...

DAMN!!! You fell.. SO WHAT??? Get up!!!

2005-05-22T00:19:00.000+08:00

We all walk an uneven path. We cant go back so we must move forward. Yes, there are stones that litter it. Sometimes we trip on these stones and bruise ourselves.... yet we still have the option to get up and start walking forward again.

But you... you tripped and fell and never got up... You gave up!!! But why??? Havent you got the courage to stand up and start walking again? You gave up damn it! Now you want to stray from your path to walk a different one? You are moving to a different path for all the wrong reasons! The other path is also full of stones and you have to start all over again from the beginning you fool. Cant you just finish the one youve started? You have accomplished so many things! And you will let one failure destroy you?

I thought you are different from everyone else. I thought wrong. You are like everyone else... weak, fearful, and most of all stupid. You let pride make decisions for you. Pride doesnt control your life. It doesnt control your decisions in life. Why do you let yourself be stupid? For this I will hate you.

You should see the real me and the problems that I face today. Youre lucky that you dont lead my life. Your problems, your failures will seem stupidly small when compared to mine. Im bruised, Im bloodied, Im weakened but I keep moving forward because I want to finish what Ive started. Straying is for people who became blind with stupidity. You know where your dream, your goal is. It is in the end of the path that you walk today. Why will you pursue other dreams when you can pursue this one?

I want to help you get up. I want to help you walk again. I want to help you reach your goal. But I know that you dont want my help. I know that no matter what I do you will refuse my help. I know that your mind is made up. And because of that I can do nothing more.... except to hate you.

From now on, I will hate you. You have no guts. You are a coward. I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!

You know, you almost make me want to cry... almost... because its not worth it crying over cowards... its just not worth it...

...

P.S. I do hope that you can read this entry... because I really want to help you... I can hope, cant I?

Yea!! I mean Yeah!!

2005-05-18T23:24:00.000+08:00

Whooopeeee! Our org is finally moving forward! What a miracle.... Thanks guys!

Project: Bloodlines

2005-05-15T01:09:00.000+08:00

Project: Bloodlines
Programming Software: RMXP or better(what i can find or afford XD)
Status: Under Development
Release Date: I hope there will be... XD

Overview

Much time has passed since the destruction of the old world. All had been forgotten. Knowledge, history, names, places, ancient texts and power have been lost. The new world is now considered much worse than hell itself. Creatures that have evolved from exposure to power leaks, restless spirits and damned savages lurk every corner of every place. There is no unity, no light, no life. That is until one man, in his struggle to survive the harsh landscape, found what has been meant for him to find all these years. The cogs of destiny has started to turn once again.

Prologue Teaser

The fire burns. It rages on, turning wood into the shadow of its former glory. As it burns, so are the hearts of the three rectors around it. Silence surrounds them as they huddle at the fireplace. They are resting, conserving their energies preparing for what lies ahead... because they know, they have known from the beginning, that there is no turning back. At the break of Orion's collapse and Phoenix's rebirth, they will die.

"We are so close.", one of them finally said in a hush whisper which only the three of them could hear.

"Indeed. Yet why do you tremble so? It is not as if your spirit has died. Are you finally sensing fear, my dear Sacratus?" the other rector, apparently tired, sarcastically said.

"I am merely... excited. I appreciate that you do not insult me tonight, my dear Caelia. This feeling, this... fear, is what separates us from... others. You know that." Sacratus said, his voice suddenly louder this time. The fire dimmed and the night wind got colder. What warmth present awhile ago is now gone. The large rector is ready for a duel.

Caelia is not moved. Silent as always, she just stared at him -- a cold and dead stare.

"Sacratus. Caelia. Stop this foolishness. You two will die tomorrow, not tonight. You know, you two never cease to anger me. I will go and prepare my legio. You two better do the same." said the third rector in a dry but powerful voice as he walked away from the bonfire and onto the hill up ahead.

Following the third rector's move, the two walked away from the fireplace without saying a word to each other.

The last nightfall has begun. Destiny will be broken. Blood will be spilled and the scar shall remain.

Let the book of the Bloodlines be rewritten...

Script Teaser

"I am different... I am alive... I am awake... Let this day be known as the day the world wept with blood."
- The 3rd Lord, after the blood compact

"Let history repeat itself. You have been killed before and so shall you be again!"
- Aedes Praesidi, the last standing

"You fight for what? Salvation? Hope? Life?.... You bore me.."
- The 2nd Lord, before the raid massacre

"You are not the death whom I once knew. You have grown weak. And the weak shall perish..."
- Sacratus

which gundam seed character are you?

2005-05-14T23:42:00.000+08:00

Fractum Lucem

2005-05-11T00:17:00.000+08:00

I see the world in a different light. I see what you won't. I hear what you don't. I believe in what you will consider foolish, stupid and blasphemous. And I am still here. Living like you do. Doing what you do. I am awake yet I am not. I am living in my world. A world where the line between dreams and reality ceases to exist.

Yes, I am dying yet I am not. It seems that the void never ceases to close. And I am finding that it is slowly sucking away all that is me. Why am I fading? Please let me know why. I'll be waiting for your reply...

Foolishness of a Foolish Fool

2005-05-09T18:32:00.001+08:00

What a title. Well, I cAnT think of any... so bear with it!

Guess what? Fusion has been moved to May 20! That means more time to do our legacy project. That means more time for laziness! Yeah! Why, you ask? It's because there are STILL only 9 new enrollees in our school. tsk tsk, poor us. no tax, no accreditation, no students... hoo boy...

Of course I'm only joking.. = )
Or am I?????.......!!!!!!!!

Anyway, I'm glad I accomplished so many things today. YEA now has Tracey!!!!!! YEAH! I'm glad she agreed to join our org. I feel great potential hidden inside of her. The only drawback is that we'll only have her till 2nd term. Oh, man... I wish she doesn't have to move. (sigh)

We also started doing our BUDYS thingy today. It's supposed to do something with changing bulletin boards and stuff... I think this will go on for about a week.

OMG! A new version of DOTA has been released! Ok, bye now, gotta play! next time!

Wat.....H..h..h.. appened?!?

2005-04-30T23:49:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling fucking weak these past few days. I'm always feeling sleepy.Tsk, I'm supposed to write a long entry today because I want to talk about FUSION, outing, YEA and nil's house. But, as I said, I... am... sleepy... G'nyt!

Thing things

2005-04-16T00:35:00.000+08:00

I just learned that I got a 2.5 in accounting.. tsk.. why am i not surprised? A damn boring nonsense course deserves a grade like that. I guess I'll not be making the list this term. Anyway, who cares?

On other matters, it seems that YEA no longer exists in the eyes of our president. Too bad. I love this org. It seems that the time I've sacrificed for the org will go to waste. Because of this, I've decided that I'll quit the org if this problem persists. No sense wasting anymore of my time...

I've observed that some people are very fucking unsensitive noisy and annoying. They just don't know when to stop. They don't even notice that people are starting to get annoyed at them. They just keep blabbing and blabbing and blabbing unnecessary stuff. I hate them.

I'm waiting... still waiting... forever and a day. It's boring when you're waiting forever. I'm bored. *sigh* 'Nyt.

I could have done more?

2005-04-12T23:39:00.000+08:00

Woke up late, around 10am, and I missed accounting! Wait, who cares anyway? So after I have freshened up I immediately went to my PC to do my entrep business plan from scratch... literally. After much thinking I then finished my business plan. Wow, a new record! 2 hours to finish a full business plan from nothing! Yeah!

Went to school around 2. Thought my class is at 2. Thought wrong. Class is at 4. 2 hours of being idle. Got frustrated. Cursed myself. Went to bcon. Full. Got sad. Can't play. Went to school. Wandered the halls of our big school till class time. Class time. Boring. Slept. Passed finished project. End of class. Bye!

About to go home. Remembered Chico. No food. Went to Landmark. Bought food. Dogfood, that is. Went home. Ate dinner. Got bored. Posted in blog. Played a game borrowed from Migs. Played till I heard a cock-a-doodle-doo. Wow Migs, What a great game! Slept... 'morning!

DOTA rules

2005-04-08T13:07:00.000+08:00

the night stalker rules the night

So much to do... So little time... Arrgh!

2005-03-30T00:35:00.000+08:00

OMG April is just around the corner! Finals week nanaman badtrip. Puno nanaman ng projects and stuff. What to do this summer? hmm...

BUDYS planning and welcoming of new members!
Just like we did last summer, we will go to a resort out of town for two days for our annual planning of activities. Man, I'm looking forward to this. This event will certainly help me relax and will temporarily free me from the chains of suffering caused by overwhelming personal problems I have this year. More important is it will allow me to bond with my friends! Yeah!

Trip to the City of Angels!
P10 is planning to go to Angeles City! WTF??? Why? I don't know... I'm just an innocent little boy...

Leadership Training!
An out of town activity to improve my leadership skills. You're never too skillful to learn. I hope this pushes through.

Project:FUSION
An activity to welcome the incoming freshmen in iAc! Last year my job was to make a CD gift presentation to give to the freshmen. I wonder what my job will be this year?

YEA Org Restructuring
YEA is facing certain difficulties this term and it is our job(w/Andrew) as the incoming top management to face this challenges. Currently YEA does not have a treasurer. Wanna be a treasurer of the one of the most wealthiest(i'm not kidding) orgs in iAc? Send me a message!

Facing my monsters
Shit I hate having problems especially personal ones... But oh well, this is life and I have to face it or else it will become a very heavy burden in the future, right?

Ok so this is a few of the things I have to do this summer. *Sigh* Let's get on with it...

A story of despair and rebirth.... Hope that all those who reads it likes it. It took me quite a while on this one.

2005-03-23T01:20:00.000+08:00

A Shadow Behind
by Me!

You are my angel, You're my light,
You are my guardian in the night,
You are my fire, You are my might,
The eternal will in my fight.

You are the maiden in my dream,
Your face so lovely of white cream,
Your smile never, never so dim,
You are her, my one endless dream.

But dreams are not reality,
Wake up! Face the truths cruelty,
And now just my one false glory
of what was once a grand story.

You just shut the fire in my eyes,
The truth are now mere painful lies,
Silence now hears damned whispered cries,
Almost the cause of my demise.

I'm beneath the thick white sheet,
Hear the sound of a dying beat,
Feel the sting of the now cold heat,
I'm falling through the endless pit.

Now begone! You, I now deny,
You are but a mere crimson lie,
Of what was once a stronger tie,
Now, forever, I say goodbye...

I walk and walk and walk again,
I gaze so cold unstopping then,
That I saw a light now and when
the stars collapse against all men.

I succummed to the dark corner,
Bloodied, Pained, in need of shelter,
Then a dove flew by my shoulder
Told a secret in hush whisper.

"Beyond the dark is glorious eden,
Those who reached it tell.
Reach for it where many have fallen.
But first traverse through this fiery hell.

See the place so dark and dense
Trees of sorrow.. sad and bent
Destined by death's kiss
Leaves not green, but black and burnt

Step forth the corrupting soil
Where creatures dare not live
Stuck below is endless turmoil
Life dares not forgive

Pass through the river of blood
Thick dark crimson flows
Insanity swims forever glad
Madness always glows

Feel the anger of the silent voice
Hollow and empty but crystal clear
Burning calmly without a noise
The very reason to fear

Endless souls trudging forth
Many dared but to no avail
Their cause of little worth
The very reason they fail

Move now! Oh brave soul
Fear not this chaotic field
Reach out for your goal
Your will is your shield

Walk through but do not run
Every step matters most
Tread your way, watch the turn
See the path, do not get lost

There are those that block your path
Take out the sword from your sheath
For the cause unleash your wrath
Bring those to the earth beneath

Carry on to your goals end
In your time you will succeed
The highest place you will stand
Because you did not concede."

Now dawn begins as darkness fade,
Watch the sunlight beam now cascade,
O! Fill the field of blackened braid,
O! Fill the silk where my hand laid.

O! Awaken again my love,
Come let us see the sky above,
Come let us see the flying dove,
The bright, eternal hope we have.

Two fucked up events that happened

2005-03-20T23:52:00.000+08:00

Damn, what a week. This is the most stressful week I've had in months. Just when I was in the middle of doing our very nice intecom project, my PC crashed! Damn I forgot to save my work! Ok, no big deal I thought I'll just start my PC again..... But then th shittest thing happened. Scandisk detected bad sectors on my hard drive and PC Doctor said that the RAM test failed. Stupid PC... I thought our group would fail because of me but just then Aeo agreed to let me borrow his RAM. What a friend! I was then able to finish our project in two days of cramming and w/o sleeping thanks to Aeo!

Edwin gave our exam results this saturday. This is the day I feared. I know I didn't study for that exam. I only glanced at my notes the morning I woke up the day our exam was scheduled. Then exam time came. I didn't fucking understand some of the questions. Confused, I just answered the questions to the best of what my mind can manage. There was one question I rememberes where we were asked to explain the meaning of cryptography. I thought hard. I then remembered the book "The Da Vinci Code". I answered the question based from what I understood from the book. The rest I forgot as I quickly went home to attend to personal matters. I moved slowly as Edwin called me to receive my exam results. I'm crying in my heart then. I know I failed. But to my surprise Edwin suddenly mentioned to everyone in class that I am the only one who got a perfect score of 100 in the exam. WTF??!?? I could kill myself right now... I know I didn't deserve that score as I didn't even do anything to reach a score of 80! But oh well... life's like that I guess. Moral of this story: Read Dan Brown's "The Da Vinci Code".

2005-03-19T20:58:00.000+08:00

my wallpaper!

2005-03-18T23:59:00.000+08:00

Why the hell did I make this?

yeah

2005-03-17T22:29:00.000+08:00

testing